Stepping away from poems for a bit has I wanted to talk about a project i’m doing for my uni course.
To say my project has been hit with issues along the way is an understatement, However I have enjoyed it. There has been so many factors that have made the filming aspact hard, from going in and out of lockdown and the passing of my dad it hasn’t been easy and took me a lot longer than I would have liked.
However, the staff on the course and the students have been amazing and I couldn’t have asked to have been in a better group.
I started filming back on 16th October where I used a room at university and acted has of it was a recording studio this is my first problem due to Covid 19. I wanted to use one of the office spaces that there is at Uni to film however due to covid we had to request to use the room where in the past we would have been free to go and look if it was in use if it wasn’t we would have been able to film in there. I did however find a place to film that I felt could have been used has a office/studio how ever this caused issues has I had to stop recording has people walked though going to classes all in all it wasn’t a good place to film and when I edited it together it didn’t have the effect that I wanted. I felt this because of the things in the background and the slight noise of people walking past the doors, how though I did like the lighting that the area gave.
However, I do like the actual video two reasons. The first one is at first, I didn’t like it has I felt that I came across has unsure and nervous. I had scripted the piece, gone over it, yes, I had I the script there has a safety net but I didn’t really need it.
When I looked back at it I felt like it wasn’t natural, it just felt scripted and seeing has the character I was playing was a blogger I felt by scripting it, it lost some of the spontaneity and natural feel, So for me it was a learning experience and something to try different in the next video.
However what I did like is even though didn’t like how the unsure and nervous I was it did add something to the character of Jess. It did give her a innocence and sweet edge, has if she honestly just wanted to sit down and talk about her experiences, it would also show the viewer the change in her later in the series.
The second thing I liked was how the glitches worked has this was something I had never done before so for a first time was very happy with.
The second video was filmed on Oct 23rd and I did I felt a lot happier with this one.
I wanted to film at a location that would work has student housing. I stayed at a premier inn that was in Wigan and it worked better than I expected, the room fitted perfectly for Jess’ story of her having a daughter but being a university student also.
I was able to put little things in the video like knocks and taps and able to write on the mirror help me, again putting glitches and clues in the video.
I also didn’t use a script for this video which I felt worked a lot better has it felt more natural when recording I could just come up with things on the fly and run with it without having to worry if I was sticking to what I said and the story kept the same.
I did feel like the lighting could have been a little better but seeing has hotels don’t really have the best of lighting.
I never believed in myself, never felt like i was worth anything people made me believe that I would never amount to anything in my life.
How ever here I am working towards what I want to do, proving you wrong.
my school failed me, my college failed me, groups I was part of failed me. I needed people to believe in me and where was you when I needed you?
Now I am stronger than I ever was, i have people who believe in me, people who want to be there, people who fight for me.
Without them I wouldn’t be where I am right now, you may think that what was did was speak the turth or was tough love but what you did and said was mean and hurtfull, you did nothing to suport me.
Now I believe in myself somthing I wish you had done.
ok, so I did it again, I missed a day posting or have I missed two? I’m not sure but in my defence I had good reason.
On Monday mum had her covid jab so I’ve been seeing to her has she was a bit under the weather after it.
I wentnto do some shopping for her and remembered on the bus when i was on my way home.
I did however get thinking, and yes i know i’ve asked this before but what would you like see me post once this lock down is over? Poems wise? just gen this please let me know.
Quick break from poems again, just to talk about Thursday.
I’m getting the first dose of covid vaccine, despite my fears of needles I’m actually looking forward to it.
Seeing what it did to my dad, granted dad had cancer also and turns out other health issues which we did know about, covid played a part even though it wasn’t the cause of his death.
I want this to be over and be able to see my friends and family, I want to be able to go to conversations again, to go to wrestling again.
It’s a year since I last went to a convention and a year at the weekend since my last wrestling show and it has knocked me for six slightly mental health wise.
Hopefully it won’t be to long now till things get back to. How they where.
Heather's adventures 